Things I can not understand in football

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LOUGHBOROUGH, March 29 2013: Similar to a boy friend who never understands the reason for his breakup, there are few things as a football fan I can never ever understand hence I remain hungover it.

How in the world did Ronaldo turned from a ferocious striker to a beer drinking extremely fat man?

RonaldoThere was a time when Ronaldo was the name of every defenders and goalkeepers worst nightmare, after all he was the only striker who could dance with a football in his leg every time he entered the opposition box. I guess God had different diet plans for the Brazillian and turned him into a ponytail-less imaginary character of Obelix and that too in the fastest possible time, which I am sure also left Diego Maradona jealous of his fellow South-American. But the good news is Ronaldo has shed those extra pounds off and now finally looks like a retired footballer and not just like a man who used his tummy as his beer table.

Was there any need of Zinedine Zidane to ever retire?

zidaneIn 2012 six years after he retired, Zidane with his old teammates at Real Madrid came together to play in a charity match and he ended up hitting that Champions League-esque volley that brought Real Madrid the shining Champions League trophy in 2002 against Bayer Leverkusen. So my question is, if he can still do that, why did Zidane retire? If I had a genie, I would make sure that even my kids end up watching this magical man play live.

Where exactly is Messi’ centre of gravity?

messiAs a kid, I remember playing with a toy whose nose had words ‘punch me’ written on it and every time I punched it, it never used to fall and actually come back with same pace with which I had punched it. I am thinking, that is the concept Messi actually works on, defenders bully him on the field but he never falls, I am just waiting for the day when he decides to glide over the green turf face first but not touch it.

Are you sure Pierluigi Collina is from planet earth?

Soccer - UEFA Super Cup 2010 - Final - Inter Milan v Atletico Madrid - Stade Louis IIIf I was a small kid and someone surprised me with a photo of Collina referring during a game, i can assure you I would have ended up having wet pant. I sometime feel the players had the same feeling towards him, may be that is why he has been the best I have seen as a referee. I got another theory, wasn’t it Collina in the carriage of the bicycle flying across the moon in Steven Spielberg’ movie ET?

How was Balotelli in school?

Italy's Mario Balotelli gestures during their international friendly soccer match against Brazil at the Stade de Geneve in GenevaMario Balotelli surely has to be that naughty kid which makes every parent feel they have the best child in the world. Which actually makes me think, how was Balotelli in school? Does his mother have a cupboard full of complaint letters from his school? Did any teacher of his actually end up quitting the school he studied in? Was he ever caught playing prank on his school’ principal?

Why does Cristiano Ronaldo like changing his hairstyle every half?

cr7CR7 is surely a talent that every budding footballer wants to achieve at one time of their career. His leg splitting posture during his free kicks is surely by now a copyright posture. But what I fail to understand is, what is the secret of two different hair styles for two different halves of the same game? Is this what he does while Mourinho is busy with team talks at halftime? or is there a special inner power that he achieves out of this?

Who took the real Michael Owen away from earth?

owenI am sure there was an alien attack in Liverpool in 2004, who took the real Michael Owen away from us and gave us a horse loving Owen. He scored 118 goals during 216 appearances for Liverpool and after that all he did was count horses and tweet his heart out. I know I should be writing this anymore especially this is his last season, but may be researchers would now be interested in getting the real Michael Owen back.

Who is more fragile Abou Diaby or Alexander Pato?

DiabyIf I was a girl dating any of the above mentioned guys, I would make sure to ask them “did anything break?” every time after a kiss. Both are incredible in themselves, on their unbreakable days Pato can make any defender look like a crying baby and Diaby can make Wilshere look like the second best thing at Arsenal, sadly the unbreakable days don’t happen that often.

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Photo credit: tumblr.com, http://www.flickr.com/photos/fotomurias/

 

To spend or not to spend?

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LOUGHBORUOUGH, Feb 20:Transfer window is one of the most exciting and interesting phase for football aficionado like me, reason being really simple, seeing players in a new jersey is fun, there is football news every second and just like that Harry Redknapp is everyone’ favorite manager. But at the same time it is tough time for clubs who are fighting relegation, because it is time for decisions, will they dip themselves in the transfer market to make a stronger team or just try to build a stronger team with what is in hand. And that is the exact question that was faced by Rednkapp’ 20th position team Queens Park Rangers and then 18th placed Lambert’ Aston Villa before the transfer window opened.

Redknapp the star of Transfer Markets since forever…

Yeah!! I know it is impossible to keep Mr. Harry away from the excitement of transfer market.

At the end of transfer window, QPR had invested £23 million in the transfer market and brought in players like Christopher Samba, Loic Remy and Andros Townsend to Loftus road while Paul Lambert’ side bought players like Yacuba Sylla and Simon Dawkins and spent mere £2 million.

“Queens Park Rangers were “out of their minds” to break the bank to sign the defender Christopher Samba from Anzhi Makhachkala” – Anzhi director German Tkachenko

Troubled times for Mr. Lambert…

As the transfer window closed, I ended up reading articles on reputed platform regarding two things, one which said ‘QPR were foolish to spend so much in the winter transfer’ while the other said, ‘Villa should have invested more to strengthen their side’. My question is, who was right was it QPR or Villa? Obviously the answer would be crystal clear once the season ends, as no one would remember the money spent if you end up saving yourself from relegation but everyone will ask the value of each penny spent if you end up having the drop. As the current situation stands, Aston Villa is out of the relegation zone by one point, while QPR still finds them self at the bottom of the table. As a neutral I am a big fan of Harry Radknapp’ managerial skills and feel if there is anyone who can save QPR it has to be Mr. Redknapp and not Mr. Samba.

The hidden dilemma of United

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LOUGHBOROUGH, Oct 8: Today I read a blog on ESPN in which the writer talked about Rooney being the answer to Ferguson’ midfield  woes, the words written describing the situation was pretty much appropriate but on the other hand being a fan of ferocious Rooney ‘the striker’ left me with many unanswered questions.

World Class Striker or Make Shift Midfieler?

There is no doubt since the time a 17-yr-old Evertonian joined the ranks of Manchester United; he has been nothing less than a revelation. He has been that complete package whose service will be acquired by any club with a simple blank cheque and without a blink of an eye. There have been times when Wayne Rooney has been the Scholes, the Ferdinand and the Keane for Manchester United. But all this doesn’t mean a man who scores goals at such ease should be pushed to midfield to create glory for a finished article like van Persie to just to bite on. With that statement I am in no way trying to undermine the prowess or ability of the amazing Dutchman. All I am trying to say is, Rooney is still too young and still a lot to conquer before he can be just pushed aside for another player to take his role.

No doubt Wayne Rooney has taken up to use the ‘global speak your mind’ platform Twitter to make it clear that he is happy playing in the midfield. Neither is there any doubt that Rooney previously has confessed, that he wants to end his career as a midfield. But my question is, is it that time when Wayne Rooney retires?

Was the magical left foot needed?

This leads me to another question; did United actually need Robin van Persie? I know your answer must be any club would want van Persie in their squad. But there is a very thin line between wanting and needing. When you have players like the established striker- like Wayne Rooney, the not so in-use but a classy striker- Berbatov, the offside breaker- Welbeck and the revelation of 2011-12 season Javier ‘Chicharito’ Hernandez already in your squad, why add a player whose prime might just last for this season?

Rooney is not the only reason why I feel addition of Robin van Persie has given Ferguson more questions than answers, as he would have earlier thought so. With Rooney picking up the playmaker role, where does that leave the Japanese sensation Shinji Kagawa? Or what plans does Ferguson have for Nani? If I do presume that Kagawa would be given the more deep lying midfielder role, where does that leave the growth of Tom Cleverley (please don’t extend Scholes contract again, give the guy a rest)?  If Ferguson decides to let Cleverley and Shinji share the holding midfielder roles, I fear Carrick should take the role of defender more seriously. So how I see Manchester United right now is like a chain of dominos, and that one trigger might bring about a catastrophic reaction.

So for me as a keen observer of the game, I would keep my eyes on Manchester United this season. I would either learn how to keep a boat sailing or how to drown a boat when it can easily sail across the seven oceans.